It’s About Education

School is hard. It doesn’t matter how old you are, going to school is difficult for most ages. Some kids may love going to school, and others may despise it, but there are always parts of school that are hard. Whether it’s the learning aspect or the social aspect, kids will generally struggle with some part of school. It’s important to remember that school is all about learning and the goal is to learn as much as you can.

Kids will think that the social part of school is the most important part - it certainly feels like it at the time. As a parent, there will be times that you have to help your child navigate the social world that they are in. But you shouldn’t be making educational decisions based off of the social aspect of school. If your child is going to fall far behind in their learning so that they can keep up socially, then they’ll struggle later.

Recently, I had a parent reach out to me that was struggling with the recommendation of her child’s teacher that suggested their child should be held back a year in school as they were struggling to meet the needed milestones. The parent was upset because they thought their child would be made fun of for being held back (this was first grade). They didn’t say anything about their child being prepared for the next grade or not.

It’s really easy to get upset and defensive when it comes to our kids - we want them to be ahead in everything that they do. We want them to succeed, and we want everyone to like them. We want the absolute best for them. Sometimes though, that means that we have to do things that may seem counterintuitive. We may have to be held back a grade in order to set them up for future success.

Teachers don’t recommend options for kids because they want them to fail. Teachers are specialized in learning and they almost always want the very best for every child that they teach. Unless there’s some type of personal vendetta against you, then there’s no reason that a teacher would recommend your child to be held back if there wasn’t a sufficient reason for that recommendation.

That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t seek a second opinion. Make sure you understand exactly why your teacher is recommending this for your child. But don’t get defensive about it immediately and not hear them out. There’s a good chance that you’ll be doing more damage to your child by not listening to the recommendations for their education. Remember that education is important when going to school.

While learning is the primary focus, the social world that they inhabit is the next most important. Your child will go through a lot of emotions as they grow up. There will be times that they don’t feel like they belong. They will get in arguments. They will go through breakups. It’s important to support your child in these scenarios and help them work through the pressures that they’re feeling - be there for them to provide support and guidance.

Make sure your child is in the best situation to get the best education they can. Listen to your child’s teacher, and help them navigate the social world at school.